Moves on with out...
him
Sometimes I sit and wonder
if he realizes how much he is missing.
Life keeps rolling wether we like it or not
Ronan is growing up
Growing up with out
him
Ronan is eating solids
Moving up to size 3 diapers
Realizing the world around him
Giving kisses
Doing funny things
And he is missing all that
Does he care?
Doesn't seem so.
This little boy will grow up
and will start realizing what is happening
It isn't fair...
Not to him
Not to anyone in this situation
Yesterday was a bad day
Today was worse
Last night I started cleaning out the storage
and you will never guess what I found?
Bits and
pieces of him
strung through out my home
I got a box and started putting it all in there
Little things of his and with every little item
I mourned.
I mourned the loss of my marriage
my best friend
my sons father
Today I woke up feeling the same way
On the way to work
I got a flat tire
As I look back on it now
I am so blessed by the kindness of strangers
A man asked if I needed help
he was able to give me a ride to my parents
where I borrowed a car
and was on time to work
After my dad too time off work
and helped me with my car issue
Even though today has been terrible
I am learning
Learning to be thankful for the little things
Even when things suck so bad
Thank you.
For helping me learn.
A.A.
Alicia,
ReplyDeleteHang in there, sweetie! Men who do not properly shoulder their responsibilities of husband and father can make life pretty miserable for their family. The ache and feeling that it is all wrong just doesn't seem to totally go away. But, with your Heavenly Father, you should be able to get on with your life! Big hugs and much love,
Aunt Shirley